We sprinkled some of Tommy ashes in the Pacific Ocean this week. We had done the same in the Atlantic Ocean on September 8 the day of his one year anniversary - his passing to better shores. Have you ever looked at human remain ashes?if you look closely, you are struck by how meaningful they are. They hold secrets, bones, dust. With them Tommy's future, dreams, dna, the man he would have been, the innocent baby he was. I stood over them in the turquoise ocean. My baby. Falling. My darling amour. Going down, they were, turning around and around. Tiny falling stars, looking at them from my eyes yet feeling from the deepest place in my heart. Turning around and around so shiny they are, as bright has twilight . Tears drenched on my cheeks and then them too in the ocean. I stay in your shadow amour. Your dust is my dust. I feel you, and while 2016 is tomorrow and time goes by you stay on the surface of my broken but resilient heart. I go days now without crying, but this ceremony reminded me how omnipresent you are to me. I vow to keep your memory alive, to continue telling your story, your extraordinary human life- so short yet magnificent in strength, wisdom & joy.

Oh- so much joy! 


Estelle Thomson